ThE PHRasE ThAt pAys
by DuncanIsHawt
Summary: The story is good so read it!1 KKKKKKKKK? DunkieDoughnutxTheOCCOC
1. Chapter 1

**Hey Bitches this is my new story an it's an awesome parody!11 so plz review K thanx!**

Hey I'm Jasmine and I have a lot of names so you can just call me Jasmine! I have a black shirt with my boobs sticking all the way out! And I dated Geoff in the past but I never cared about name spelling so I'm calling him Jeff from this point!

My story starts out with me sitting in my room watching Total Drama on my TV when Chris whose name is spelled Kris as of now because I failed school and I used to fall asleep in English class. "Hey Hottie! Do you want to come to the show and hang out with the campers who really want to hate you?"

"TTYL!" I screamed in chatspeak delight for I is an R illerate buffoon

"Koolio" Kris told meh "go 2 da dock outside there will be a boat 4 u 2 get on which will take you to a desserted island where they will kill you for writing horrible stories"

"wut?" I r asked like a moron I be

"I meant it will take you 2 meet da cast" Kris told me and since I failed school many many years in a row I agreed thinking nothing of it. I den went 2 the doxs outside an I saw a boat my house and it ruined all my grass in my yeard.

Duncan was the won driving thy boat I glomped him and tried 2 molest him with all my bad spelling and failure

"OMFG! DUNKIEDOUGHNUT WHAT R U DOIN HERRREEE?" I scaremed

"Hey Sexy" Duncan looked at me like I r is candy "What's your name?"

"I'm Jasmine" I told him "Spelled T-R-O-L-L and I thunked u b hawt!"

"Yeah I R know" Duncan told me in his sexy ass voice that just screamed "Do me now" witch lukay 4 me he did want 2 do meh 2 and he grabbed my azz and then rubbed mai theigh and as we took the boat 2 the island we made out on the edge of the boat completeling reenacting the titanic scene!1111~

As we were makin out the whole way there we saw Dumbledore standing on a lonely island casting a spell he then saw us and screamed MOTHERFUCKER at DunkiedOUghNutt and my baby Dunkie just flipped him off.

**Don't be a bunch of epically awesome failing Gwens! ;D **


	2. Chapter 2

OMFG A CHAPTER!1111111111REVIEW NO FLAMES! Im seryous about the story bitchiies. I'm not a troll1!1111 I'm so pretty!11 an S3xiiiii1!1

I changed on the boat. I wore a highlighter pnik skinny jeans revealing my insanely big titties and a The Acdemy Si... shit! I put my blonde streaked hair in a ponytial. It wus she sexii cuz i potted un my boots wit highheels and put heartsie earrings and a bow in mah hair1! I luvvv hawt topic it's the best store eve!1 they have all this kawalli awesome and overly priceded Twilight stuff.

As spoon as me get 2 the island I got 2 the playa dee luzer place witch is perfect 4 me cuz I am en emo loser at school who sometimes gets shirts mixed upp wit shit so dat makes 4 awkward dais sumtymes much like 2 day "why do you have shit on your shirt?" Gwen that goth loser who has multiple men who want her asked me an me replied "Wut? Why u lookin my sexay tits?" and then the looser told me "biatch I am not lookin ur tits you have shit on your shirt"

"WTF Gwen!" Dunkie hit her with a metal bat "U be a Jealice hoe because I luv her more then u and Courtney"

Gwen ran to the hotel to cry as me and Duncan made out even more untyal we stopped when some strange boy appeared he had a N shaped scar stuck 2 his forhud

"Duncan!" the strange boy yelled "He whoo shalt not bee named is aftah me an I need ya help 2 defeet him"

"okai" Dunkie agreed an kissie me "wait here babe ur titties r 2 big an u r 2 sexai 2 fight with me"

DunkieDoughnut then ran of 2 fight wit dat strange boii an while he wuz gonnne Noah and Bridgette was fightin ova me an they were both tryin 2 rapes me so I get pregananat

Duncan then came back and saw what was going on and punched them both in the face and they went inside to cry just like Gwen.

"I luve u Jasmine" Duncan told me "I luves u even if u haved many stooped named and everythanf "

"proved it" me asked him "prode u luves me"

"hair" Duncan handed me 2 thangs "here is a hut topix gift card an 2 tickets 2 see my cemichal rowmanhce"

We made out the whole way to the concert

I update fats! review nice or I wont con/tinue kawaii stroy!


	3. Chapter 3

**PLZ STOP FLAMIN1!1 I'm NOT an troll, whatEVer that is. this sint a trollfic! I tried to put efort into this chapter! Stop flaming plz. I R nott troll I is sexay an trollz r uglay **

Today I wock up. I put on mah faaave A black n pink n purple miniskirt with a panic at da disco tshiiirrt over mah blu brah. I wor mah highlighter blu vans and put in a butterfly nosering. I put on knee haigh kyut socks. I looked so hot and indie!1!1 Tehn I met Duncan and we went to the pool and went to the lounge chairs.

So Dunkay and me be making out and he was tooching my lisps wit his fingers which was toetally hawt!Coaty and Bridgehead cummed out wearin black cuz dey were emo cause I no gay for them and coaty was angree cause No….AHHHHHHHHH luv me an not him

Neway DunkieDoughnut and me wuz making out and making it to 124th base wen Noaahhhhhhhhhhh wasled out an says "WTF U DOIN? I WANNA RAPE HER DUNCAN I THUNKED WE DISSCURSED THIS AT BAND CAMMMPPP!"

"We are makin pout u dumb fuk" Duncan told him "I am feelin her 56fff titties!"

Noaahhhh den pulled out a boouk made of metel an he trysed 2 beet Dunkian witn it "SHES MIND U NASTEY BASSTURD!"

Noahhhhh jumped on meh an he startud 2 hump meh an I luv dunkie so I pushed Noahhhh of me an sayd "u sick freek get of me"

"I h8 u an I am gontna slit my ristsz!" Noahhhh ran away and den strted makin out with Coaty

"WUT A FREEK!" Dunckie told me "u ar beetuiful an perfit an I luve u even if I is havin threesome wit Gwen and Courteney on de side an I may has AIDZ"

"wut aidz?" I asked like a stupid fuk

"nuthin" Duncan asserd me

We started makin out again and I stuck my hand in his pants and he grabbed my ass and it was so hawt.

But then...

**omg clif hanger! No flmaing!1!**


	4. Chapter 4

**k thanx sooo much all revewrs who are nice! all u other guys are stoopid gwens! I HATE U FLAMERS!1!**

**also I'm not a torll! **

So den Duckie stopped makin out with me and he ran to Gwein an started sexing her upp an lieke taukin 2 herr

I was so in shoock dat I also dead!11 "SLAMDUNKIN!1 U R CHEATIN ON MEH OMMM NOM NOM NOM NOMMMMMM!111 ELEVENTYYYY SIIXXXXX ERECTION TWOOOO! WITH MORE RANDUMB FUKIN LETTAS!"

"ITS 2 L8 I H8 UUUUU" I R yelled as him tried 2 pelvuc thrust meh wit his pantz off "NOOO NOT NOWZ I STILL H8 U AN IT 2 L8 IM GONNA SUASIDED!"

As me raned off 2 kill meself I saw Bridgehead tryin 2 do da same thang an den I realized I R lesbo an I wuz lyke "DUN'T JUMPP I LURVE U MORE THEN DUNKIE!"

But she didn't care and jumped anyway (OH NOES SWEET HOES!) I useded my super jetpack shoez and got 2 da bottom before her jus inn tyme to caught her an den we macked out wit hawt steemy lesbo kisses just luke bandcamp an she even licked da shit off ma shirt an dat wuz hawttt!

Courtney den randomly showed up sum randumb locatin an startud 2 beat up Dunkan lyke reallie baaaad "COULDNTY U C I SECRUTLY LUVED HER? HOW DA FUK CULD U TAKE HERR 2 C MEH CHEMICYAL ROHMANCHE! I WUNTED 2 TAK HERR AN I HAD BETTA SEATSZ!16"

Me h a Bridege jus kept sexing it upp as Courtney ran awai


	5. Chapter 5

**FOR THE LATS TYME! I am not a troll!11! review nice and engoy!1! If u dnt like mah strypy don't read stoopid gwensss!** **Iu make me sick1!**

Meh an BrydgeHead were so buzay confssin our luv 4 each utter we diednt no dat da killer waz lyke randumblay behind uss!11

I was wiping Bridgetza teers away an cden she yelled "OMGZ IT'S DA RANDUMB KILLA WHO HAS BEEN CHASIZING MEH EVA SINCE I FUK KRIS DA MEH CHEMIYCAL ROHMANYCE CONCIRTTT! DA KILLA WUZ MAD DAT I WULDN'T FUK HIM AN NOW HE WANTZ 2 MAKE MEH HIS HOOKAH AN HE HAZ A METAL PIRATE HOOK TWOOO222!"

"Gasp!" I gaspeded "A KILLA WITH A HOOKER AND A HOOK? NO FOOKING WAIII!"

I nude dat moment I was gunna be DYED!

HE tried 2 stab meh in my Va-Gay-Jay! Wit his hook

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OMGGGG NOT MY GAY-JAY-VA-JAY-JAY!1111 OH FUKIN NOESSS!

Jusytine then randumblay shud upp and I nude wut I hadz 2 dooo! Pokemanz music started 2 play! Me then screamed "JUSTYNE USEDED SUPOR UBER SEXIII PELVIK THRUST ON CERAL KILLA NOW!"

Justyme used SUPOR UBER SEXIII PELVIK TRUUUUUST! An it wuz soopah effective! It wuz soo effective dat he instantly DEAD!

He dyed!1 OIMFGGGG. There was blud everwhere? I started cyring! He had died over meh! I cyred "JUSTYN DON'T LEV ME! I LUV U!11!"

"I CANT BELEEV U KILLD HIM BITCHHHH!" BRIGGGDRA YELED SHE SMAKED ME! OMFG

"DONT HIT MY GIRLFROND!' a sexii voice sed.

omg WHO CAN IT BEI1!1

**clif hangar!**

**Review nice plz!1! AH needs it cuz ur making me derpressed. Im young and kinda dyslexic and hypers and stufffffs1 dton bi mein ookkkkkkk?**


	6. Chapter 6

**k so omfg guyz, how many tims do I have 2 say im NOT A FUCKIN TROL!11! u no wut Im not even gonn boter NEmore1 cuz u gys nevr lissen!**

it was….

EZAKILL!

"Ello thar" he sed in a sexay britesh voice "I R talkin lyke dis cux da volcano sended me 2 britinland

"OMFG!" I screamed in text forum "dat is awesum!"

"ikr!" he screamed at me in text forumem "so neway don't hit my gurlfried" he den lungeded at bridgehead and I r no clu wat wuz goin on cuz I no thunk we were together!11675534

He jumpeded and juomped on her like a trampoleene until she squirtieded blood ooyt of hr mouthn I r shockrrf

"U KILLIED HAR AND SHE DEADED WITH SUACIDESD!" I screamed not knowing what the fuck I was actually saying.

"ya" he agreased "I didn't mened ti killed har I jut wantied u 2 mysalf let'z make on!"

So we didded an den he ask me 2 go bak 2 hogworts wit him 2 studay magik an I wuz all

"OMFG! DRACO MALFOY IS SOOOOO HAWWTTT!" I R screameded in his fase an spit wented flyin everywhar "we eneted to c my chemycial rohmancey thar once an after dat we sexeded uppp!"

"OMFG!" Zeke agreed "MII 2222"

We wuz abot 2 go to see da conshit an then

…

….

…

..

.

DUNKAIWN APPERED!11!

**omfg moar clifhunders.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Stop beng mean! :( Ur oll Newgs! I dun cre if se almost wun, she tills fsuck!s**

Duncan tryied 2 lyke opalagize until he saw how buff zeke was knot 2 mention his new super hero sexy accent. DunkieDoughnut knew he culd never cumpear.

Zekey an me has a partay due to da fact he becamed a superhero cuz he was buff an stuff in fact he wuz no hero all he wuz jus buffier then buffy da vampiure slya an supa menz

I got us 3 liquor from da guy da store cause he was all

"u r so hawt an he is so buff u guyz deserve dis shyt"

And den I wuz all "TTYL I NO! I AM SUCH A SLUTTY MARAY SUEDDDD I'M LYKE SUPER SEXAY AN ALL"

Den the conversation went on lyke that 4 a whale cause we talked in chat speak an lyke he couldn't understooded me an I coulndn't understanded him either it was lyke he wuz speeking Japanese which I don't understood well too =( =( =( =(

I h8 wen pplz wroted 2 me and talkied 2 me in other languages becuz I has a hard tym,e wit basic 2nd grade spellinz toooooooooooooooooo!344$5~

So newaized we gotted da booze and den…..

To das partay, I wore my pink mini skrit. I al,so wore mah halter top dat wass purple n sparkly and blu fishnets and mah hooker earrings. I was so sexy! :D

eVERY1 lotsa da drink, 'specially trent 'cuz we was deperssed 'bout Negw (EWWWDRG) XZKE N IShared sum Wodka N DRANK DA ENTIRE THINGI

we ended up going into da forrest butt ass u can tell I can't spell dat wurd either so let's call it the frost instud….soundz gud write? Newaiz we went 2 da sexai kawii frosty forest an in passing we saw he who shall knott be named but since I am sooooo sexay I figured he wouldn't mynd if I did it ne wayz

"voldemortyyyyyyy! HAYYYY YOU R LYKE SO KAWII AN SEXAY! I LUV YOUR T-SHIT"

He blushed an wuz all lyke "thankz, I cummeding bac from da panic da disco concirt!"

An den I was all "OMG WTF BBQ I MISSED DAT SHYT?"

He nodded at me an den he went to go stalk sum kid wit dis uglay scar on his faice in da woods (LYKE EWWW! EVA HERD OF COVERIN DAT SCAR THANG UP WIT MAKECCUP!65?)

So zeke an eye started feelying each other up in da woodzzz

Den we looked da tree next 2 us an we saws

TRENT N A BERA HAVIN SEZZUAL INNERCOARSE!1111!11!1!1!111!1!

"Bera?" Zeke askied meh "Who's Bera?"

"Cant u c her?" I asked "she is right thar!"

"I cant c weel it's frosrty in dis forrest" he tolded me "Do you mean Bridgette or Beth?"

"I dunno" I admitted "every1 lookz da same 2 me an I am knott good at remembaraing faices every1 here lookz lyke a kartune 2 meh"

"dats cause we r" zeke tolded me

"NO WAI!" I didn't believe dis shit and I decyded to hav sex with him neway cause he was obviously drunk to tink dey all be kartunes

**be nice! no flamse plz!its not contrictvie cyrcumcism id u tlee meh off!**


	8. Chapter 8

_**ESUES CYST PPL IM NOT A FUCKIM TEOLL!**_

_**also y do u guys thin im riting inaproprt shit oi meawat do u think i am mroman?**_

Zekey an eye dhen gasped ab eye r screamed "GAASP!"

"WTF OMG Y R U WATCHIN ME?" Trent yelleied an he wuz obviously ova gwen cuz he wuz sexing herr upp

Tehn dis randumb beer cam an growled

"Beer?" Trent asked "How dus beer growl?"

"I meanted Bare" I tolded him "Lyke duh!"

"Bare?" Trent asked "Like naked?"

"know!" I yellud att da nakkied Trent N Bera "not lyke naked lyke da annimull"

"What?" Zekey akied me "I can't understand you"

"Me neither" Trent agreed "This whole event makes no sense at all"

"I don't even know who I am" Bera/Bridgette/any random female character with a B or 4 letters in her name

"Wut?" I askidd

"I can't dooo dis ne more" Zeke saiud in horrible chat sppeek "I don't know what I'm sayin 87% of da tyme"

"wut r u sayin?" I askied zeke who confoosed meh cause he startyed 2 lyke speek normal an I get confusified wen pplz do dat

"I'm saying that I'm leaving" Zeke told meh "On a side note if you turn around there is a bear behind you"

Den Zekey walked out on meh an I still donut why!24

Trad an Bera den ignoried me an continued 2 have innercoorse

Den I sawed a killer agun

DAS SICKO KILLT WIT DA CHYANSEW ND HIS TIM HE HAD 2 HOoKKeRS!


	9. Chapter 9

**I can spell bettar now cuz LaduDude proofreader! thanks dude, u supah kawiil! Stop flmaing the stroy and i hop whoever ix copyin stops even tho i amflattered GET UR OWN IDEA I WAS HERE FRIST!**

Trend an Bera/Beth/anyone with 4 letters in their name or starts wit a bee amd eye ran atopless 2 da mountain so da killa wouldn't killes us!1

All of a suyden Gwen and Duncan cummed up 2 da mountain

"HOLY FUCK WE HERD3D DA PHYCO KILLA WAS ON DA LOOSE!" DunkieDoughnut yelled

"OMFGWTFBBQBFFJILL! HERE HE CUMS!" I screamed

"HOLY FUCK IT'Z HIM WHY THE FUCK DID EYE CUM UP ON DIS MOUTAIN NEWAY?56" Dunky yellied

"2 save me?" I questunned him

"I guess" he tolded me "I can't read dis crap script thang you wroteded"

The pyscho killer looked angrily! And den, he SLASHED GEWN! 0;

hE was aboot to slash me but then DUNKAIN JUMPED IN THE WAI!111!1

"WUT R U DOOIN BABEEE?" I screamied ass he juymped in frunt of mii

"I R DOING WUT THE SCRIPT SAYSSSSSSSSSSSSZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!" Dunkie screamed an jumpied in frunt of me "FOR NARNIA!"

Den da killa stabbed him in da chest cutting off his nipples in deep recess

He wuz dying so I knelted down in hiz bleed an eye wuz all "I love you….u don'tnt hav 2 doo dat"

He den toldied me "I had 2 it wuz in da script! Butt donut worry! Alas I shall return in chapter 14"

Does were he las wurds an den he dyed

and then...

THE VOLCANOE ERECTED! WHITE HOT LAVA SHOT UP IN the AIR. IT CAME DOWN SUPER RED HOT!~

i ran away and drank da last of das vodka cuz i was thirst! I ranned to the camp cuz it was close but not too close to get burned!

**Revii nice please! I worked hard on dis chapter!**


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